Ricky Dicky Dene Gervais

Fuck me, I’m confused. I don’t know what I’m wearing. Does it even match? I knit. And I crochet pot-holders. And I make butt ugly Christmas cards for hours and it doesn’t even show. It’s hard to make butt ugly Christmas cards without finger nails. I dislike speech bubbles (you know like those in comic strips, but made by common people with slightly less enriched life that others). I also dislike ice shows and people whom write in english what would in fact just as well be written in swedish. I actually think I would decline an invitation to an ice show even if I got payed to be present. With God as my witness, if I ever get rich I will exclusively buy people and stomp on their pride. In heart and soul, I am a bully, I am. I want a pig boy Nigel of my own. Ricky Gervais, you are the man I never became.

And this above all; to thine own self be true.

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